Well I recently went back to Georgia for my Aunts' funeral and even though it was a sad event something good came from it. I still can't feel, but now I'm at least better adjusted with my current life and where I want to go. I also realized that my cousin Nathaniel is one of my favorite cousins; not just because we're cool, but also because he took a stand on his life and continues to do so. Well anyways let's get started.
So I'm about to start drawing again just so I can do something that I enjoy, and also something that the lord blessed me with. I'm probably gonna get the art supplies on one of my days off so hopefully sometime next week I will be good :). When I start I'll post some pictures of them.
Just started tweeting a little bit we'll see how that goes. Kinda fun just posting whatever that is on your mind.
Post Office work is actually kinda nice this time around, and it also looks like I'll actually be here for a while so I can make plans with my life. Met some cool people and I'll continue down this path until it's time to change, and do something else.
The only real thing I'm missing now is a place of my own; which hopefully GOD blesses me with by this summer :D.
Other than that don''t have much to say right now just continuing hoping for the best. This is Peeta SF Mellark and I'm signing out V_\\\ :P...........
Thursday, January 24, 2013
Thursday, January 10, 2013
Is this always the necessity?
Well after sleeping nearly 18 hours, not really sure how I did it; I feel almost disgusted. Not in a physical way just more emotionally than anything. I feel so damn empty on the inside it's frustrating at times. I'm not sure what to do and I'm definitely not sure what the future holds for me, but I'm hoping that I can figure this out before I get there. Well onto the show...
So I might be having a child during the summer of this year which for me I'm okay with having one and without having one. Right now I'm trying to maintain a friendly relationship with the mother, but more than likely that is all there's going to be to our relationship.
I'm also talking to this lesbian girl who is my friend, but also a little more. She's cool and she understands how I feel so there's no hardships or struggle in our semi-friendly relationship.
My relationship with Shemell is done I'm assuming so I think me and her will just continue on with this faux thing we do where we chill and enjoy each others company once in a while, but more than likely nothing past that.
Right now I'm just trying to see how this post office thing work out in hopes I can start the adventure that I want/need in my life right now. I need to leave because I need to leave some of these situations and people behind. I feel like if I don't then I will just get stuck in the same ole story same ole song and dance routine that I rather just die than deal with. I refuse to be stuck in that lifestyle. I hate it, I truly truly do hate that stagnant, repugnant lifestyle. It is just not for me.
So if I keep this job, at the end of the year or sometime this year I am going on a trip across seas. I really don't care if I go by myself I'm just not staying in the U.S. all year again if I don't have to. I can't stand some of the people I have to deal with regardless of how I outwardly represent myself to them. I have no problem dealing with you, but you'll haven't made my life any easier.
Also as of a week or so ago I tried hurting myself. Didn't use a knife or anything just self inflicted pain and those days it felt good. I felt alive even if it was just for a moment. Right now I feel so dead on the inside though. I'm just gonna try and get through the day. I love life, but death seems so inviting atm.
My name is Peeta SF Mellark and I'm signing out V_\\\........
So I might be having a child during the summer of this year which for me I'm okay with having one and without having one. Right now I'm trying to maintain a friendly relationship with the mother, but more than likely that is all there's going to be to our relationship.
I'm also talking to this lesbian girl who is my friend, but also a little more. She's cool and she understands how I feel so there's no hardships or struggle in our semi-friendly relationship.
My relationship with Shemell is done I'm assuming so I think me and her will just continue on with this faux thing we do where we chill and enjoy each others company once in a while, but more than likely nothing past that.
Right now I'm just trying to see how this post office thing work out in hopes I can start the adventure that I want/need in my life right now. I need to leave because I need to leave some of these situations and people behind. I feel like if I don't then I will just get stuck in the same ole story same ole song and dance routine that I rather just die than deal with. I refuse to be stuck in that lifestyle. I hate it, I truly truly do hate that stagnant, repugnant lifestyle. It is just not for me.
So if I keep this job, at the end of the year or sometime this year I am going on a trip across seas. I really don't care if I go by myself I'm just not staying in the U.S. all year again if I don't have to. I can't stand some of the people I have to deal with regardless of how I outwardly represent myself to them. I have no problem dealing with you, but you'll haven't made my life any easier.
Also as of a week or so ago I tried hurting myself. Didn't use a knife or anything just self inflicted pain and those days it felt good. I felt alive even if it was just for a moment. Right now I feel so dead on the inside though. I'm just gonna try and get through the day. I love life, but death seems so inviting atm.
My name is Peeta SF Mellark and I'm signing out V_\\\........
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